Happy YOU Year

And so it begins, the barrage of commercials for fitness products and wellness plans that conveniently happen just as we are about to start the new year.  Their timing is impeccable. Most of us are walking around in bleary-eyed exhaustion from the whirlwind of the holidays. We’ve most likely overindulged in some way, maybe with our finances, food, alcohol…and then these commercials scream out to us they they’re here to save the day! To make us feel better, be better, look better, do better…and we are drawn to them like Pepé Le Pew to his one true love.

I’ve never been a big new year’s resolution kind of gal. Maybe because I’m a rebel and if everyone else is doing it, I don’t want to. Ok, well…I’m not much of a rebel… 

I like to think that I’m not a fan of new year’s resolutions because of the way they’re perceived, that resolutions are seen as temporary or fleeting.  Either way, I was curious about the resolution trend, so I Googled new year’s resolutions and thanks to Empoweredpres.com, found the top ten new year’s resolutions from 2011. In 2011, people vowed to:

10. Help people.

9. Spend more time with family.

8. Get out of debt.

7. Learn something new.

6. Organize yourself.

5. Quit drinking.

4. Enjoy life more.

3. Lose weight.

2. Get in shape.

1. Stop smoking.

All of these seem pretty productive and some downright necessary. So why the issue with new year’s resolutions? A resolution after all is nothing more than a declaration to make a change.

Maybe it’s really the post-resolution actions we have a problem with; the follow through that’s needed to make the change happen.

For those of you that are regular readers, you might have noticed that I close each blog post with the same words. Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Ask for help. Continue with courage.

2013 is right around the corner. What is ONE change you want to make in the coming year?

Make the choice to make a change. Give the change a voice. Write it down or vocalize your goal to a friend. It’s your life, it’s your choice.

Commit to the choice. Develop a plan of action to make the change happen. Write your plan down and share it with a friend. A very wise colleague of mine reminded me that if action is not taken within 30 days, it usually doesn’t happen. Don’t start next week or tomorrow, start today.

Ask for help. Those top 10 new year’s resolutions listed above, they are NO joke. As Rick Warren said, "we are made to get well in community with each other". You do not need to do this alone. Recruit a friend to come along on the change journey with you. This person should not just be your cheerleader, but someone who will keep it real with you at all times.  

Continue with courage.  This might be the hardest part. This is where you’ll need to dig deep. As we all know, change does not and will not happen overnight. It might take weeks, months or even years. Believe in yourself.  Believe that you’ve got it going on. Believe that you can do it.

Know that you’ve been given the desire, knowledge, talent, skills, determination and courage to make it happen. 

It's going to be a happy YOU year!

Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Ask for help. Continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

Mary Did You Know

Over the past week I’ve been deliberating on what I wanted to write about as we head into the New Year. I wanted it to express how blessed I feel in so many ways. I wanted to share how good it feels to be healthy and to ask others to join me.  I wanted to send a call to action to be well, not just physically, but emotionally and spiritually. Yet I wasn’t sure how to start and what to say.

Before my blogging days, I just liked to write. I’d write little stories and poems and I’d share those words with folks who I thought needed them. This was back before the days of social media so I’d use something called e-mail to reach out to people. I wrote the story below when our daughter experienced a traumatic gymnastics injury, went through a few surgeries and a year of physical therapy. I wrote it at Children’s Hospital (CHOP) as I was surrounded by children who were far more ill than our daughter.

While sitting at CHOP waiting for Ashlee to come out of surgery, I was seated directly in front of a small wheelchair. It was obviously a customized wheelchair that got a lot of use.

The name Mary was embroidered in pink thread on back of the chair. A Cinderella backpack hung from the side of the wheelchair.

And I sat and waited, staring at the chair.

I looked at how small the wheelchair was and the oxygen canister that was hooked to the chair. I looked at the straps that held the child in and imagined that she had no body control. The chair had brackets to hold her wobbly head in place.

I watched her parents sit and wait.

And I sat and waited, staring at Mary’s chair.

I thought about Mary’s family. What pain they must have endured, what life lessons did they learn?

And I thought about my family. How privileged we are.  Ashlee’s injury is a minor life inconvenience. Will it be hard?  Yes.  Am I tired- yes? But it’s just an arm, and it’s just temporary.

What lessons would we learn from this?

Would we appreciate each day?

Would we see life as a gift?

Would we live in each moment with each other?

Or would we go back to our self-centered ways?

Irritated by traffic…dramatic about work… agitated about finances…frantic about schedules…vain in our appearances… troubled by relationships.

Would we ever think about Mary again? Her adorable little wheelchair with the pink lettering and the Cinderella backpack.

I’ll bet that the most basic pleasures in life would bring Mary joy- to be able to speak, walk, eat, think and breathe on her own.

And at that moment it all connected with me- Mary…Mary…Mary…

Was there another Mary who long ago sacrificed her son for me?

If this son died for my very life…was I living each day in His joy?

Was I living for His pleasure or for mine?

What or who is your joy today?

I never met Mary’s family, nor did I ever get to see Mary. We left the waiting room before Mary came out of surgery. I’ll never forget how I felt that day at CHOP.  I suddenly realized that living a life of joy is not only mine for the taking, it’s mine for the making. I was reminded that with every obstacle that comes my way, I have the choice to make the best of it.  

Are you making the most out of what has been given to you?

What or who is your joy today? Let's work together to find that joy and to share it with others in the New Year!

Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Ask for help. Continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

Explosion of Joy

Isn’t it amazing how something or someone comes into your life just when you need it most? Whether it’s a special friend or family member that shows up at just the right time, a song lyric that strikes a chord, words in a book that speak to your heart or maybe a message from a TV show or movie.

This past weekend, I was watching Super Soul Sunday on OWN and they featured a video short by Soul Pancake called Heart Attack. If you have 3 minutes to spare, click here.

Soul Pancake set up a button on a busy boardwalk that said “Need some love? Push here!” 

Some people didn’t even notice the button and kept going about their day. Some slowed down, giving a curious glimpse, even back tracking to look at it again, but they didn’t press the button. Those who pressed the button, well, they got quite the surprise. They received an explosion of joy! A compartment opened up and out came people dressed up as hearts, holding balloons, shooting streamers and saying I LOVE YOU. Watch the video, it’s bound to make you smile and who doesn’t need a little stress relief this time of year. The reactions of those who pressed the button are priceless. I love the manly man who was being circled by hearts dancing around him. He’s got a huge grin on his face and has his hands in the air, just celebrating being celebrated.

When was the last time you were loved like that? Or the last time you showed someone love like that?

Have you ever given yourself permission to love yourself like that?  To celebrate who you are.

Seeing the joy-filled faces of perfect strangers in the video reminded me of how important it is to slow down, especially this time of year, to take the time to give and receive love. And to make time to take care of yourself, so that you can be your best you.    

In a few days, millions of people around the world with gather with family and friends to celebrate the great gift of love from our Creator.  A love that was sent to this earth to fill us with hope, peace, joy and life everlasting. I can’t help but imagine that when we receive the gift of love from our Creator, it’s like pushing that red button that says “Need some love? Push here!”  

When we push that red button, the heavens explode with joy. And just like the manly man in that video, we are circled by hearts dancing around us. And our Creator, He’s got a huge grin on his face and has his hands in the air celebrating us, for exactly who we are, for exactly who He created us to be.

I wish you and your loved ones a holiday season filled with unexpected explosions of joy!

And look forward to sharing another year of good health, happiness and wellness with you!

Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Ask for help. Continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

The Bystander

We’ve all heard the saying “eyes are the window to the soul”, but how about “eyes are the mirror of the heart?” One of my favorite things about being a Weight Watcher’s leader is being able to connect with people from all walks of life. Before, during and after the meetings, I do my best to ensure that members feel valued, heard and well cared for. And although I’m using my ears to listen to their stories of triumph and struggle, I’m using my eyes to peek into their hearts.

When I look into certain members eyes, I see my own heart. Not my heart now, but my heart as it was when I was in so much pain, cloaked in darkness.  I see people who are tired. Not just physically tired, but emotionally tired. Tired of struggling to lose weight; asking if the effort is really worth the sacrifice. I see people who are lost. They look in the mirror and don’t even recognize the face staring back at them. They self-loathe and berate, wondering how they let themselves go, not just in gaining weight but in losing track of life. They’ve spent days, months, maybe even years looking from the outside in. They’ve become a bystander in their own lives.

Yet in others I see light. I see men and women who are filled with hope. People who have joined together to celebrate this thing we call life. Side by side they reach important milestones- losing 5% of their weight, 10% of their weight, reaching GOAL and becoming a Lifetime Member.  They celebrate the non-scale victories just as whole-heartedly as they do the weight loss victories. Those non-scale victories are what help them to leave their bystander days behind. 

They start living again: Taking risks. Trying new things. Facing trials head on.

They are brave and courageous. 

They are filled with peace, gratitude and joy.

Do you want to be a bystander in your own life? Or do you want to: 

Take risks. Try new things. Face trials head on.

Life might seem dark to you right now, but remember you can’t experience light without darkness. Hope always overcomes despair.

It’s your time to shine.

Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Ask for help. Continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

Begin Again

For those of you who have been at this weight loss gig for a long time, I wonder what you find more challenging- the actual weight loss or long term maintenance?

Having been on both sides of the fence, I find they’re both equally challenging. Losing and maintaining require the same amounts of commitment, endurance, planning, focus, perseverance and a positive outlook.   

For me, losing the weight slowly and maintaining for the long term has required an ongoing reinvention of myself.  

“People have forgotten how to tell a story. Stories don't have a middle or an end anymore. They usually have a beginning that never stops beginning”.  ~Steven Spielberg

Good point Mr. Spielberg, or can I call you Steven?  Yet I kind of like the idea of a beginning that never stops beginning. Isn’t that what wellness is? Diets have beginnings and endings. Being healthy and fit for life is a beginning that never stops beginning.

Too many times I’ve watched people go on a hard core diet and most times they lose successfully. But they are so starved and deprived in the end that six months later the weight (and then some) has come back. I’ve not only watched people repeat this cycle, I’ve done it myself.

If you are losing weight currently, or have a goal to lose weight in the new year, I challenge you to take a look at your weight loss approach.  Make sure your goals are S.M.A.R.T.

·         Specific

·         Measurable

·         Achievable

·         Realistic/Relevant

·         Time bound

Replace the word “diet” with being well, getting fit or achieving good health.  

Remember that the changes you make should be maintainable for life.  

Overall wellness is a beginning that never stops beginning.  At the company I work for, when we were designing our strategic plan last year, we boiled the actions down to “how can we get better"? 

What can you do right now (not tomorrow- right NOW) to start getting better? Every day is the perfect time to begin again.

Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Ask for help. Continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara