The Great Confessional

Well…well…well….yesterday I found myself face to face with…the great confessional…Every day…at a Weight Watchers meeting near you….its members face something with mighty and majestic powers…the scale. 

As a WW member and now a leader, it’s so interesting to watch people as they approach the scale…a.k.a. the great confessional.  Some approach with an “I’m all that and a bag of chips” confidence. Chin held high, they weigh in, maybe even wearing jeans, jewelry AND keeping their shoes on.  If you've weight in publically before, you know what I'm talking about with the jeans, jewelry and shoes. They know they had a great week and are excited to see their weight loss reflected on the scale.

Others are just not sure. As they wait in line, they can’t tell if they had a good or bad week. They think they had a good week and based on their behaviors all signs point to yes, yet they’re a bit unsettled about it. They shuffle their feet, wring their hands, glance around the room avoiding all eye contact and patiently wait their turn to be weighed.

Lastly, there are those who are very sure that facing the scale is their come to Jesus moment. All of the sudden that scale becomes the great confessional.  We’ve all been there right? Speaking from experience, it goes a little something like this.  On a day such as this, as I’m dressing for my WW meeting, I put on my lightest clothes possible.  I definitely DO NOT eat before my meeting but I do bring a snack and a water to eat AFTER my weigh in. As I drive to the meeting, I replay my bad choices in my head thinking “what the he@$ is a matter with you Tara, you KNOW better?” By the time I actually get to the meeting, I’m already in a tizzy. I (of course) hit the bathroom getting every ounce of pee out of my system. Waiting in line for the scale, I fidget and jitter around like I have ants in my pants and am facing the Queen of France. When it’s my turn to weigh in, I strip down to what’s socially acceptable without going naked.  And then, the great confession begins. It starts something like “I already know what the scale is going to say. I’m sure I gained. I didn’t drink enough water. I ate out three times. I drank too much coke.  I couldn’t exercise because I was sick. I didn’t write down my food. I had my period. Chocolate. Chocolate. Chocolate. Work stressed me out. The dog ate my homework”. Soon I sound like some sad, bad country music song that’s playing the score of my life.

As I’m blurting my confession out to my leader or the receptionist and I hear her whisper that I’ve gained, suddenly what I’m hearing is “You’re a failure. You didn’t try hard enough. How could you do this to yourself? You’ve been doing this for 16 years. You should be perfect.  How could you get this wrong? You know better.”

This week, after not weighting in for a month and that month being the holiday season, I knew my weigh-in was not going to be pretty. Add to that a broken foot, being on exercise restriction combined with just getting back from an all-inclusive all you can eat vacation…I knew it was not going to be pretty, it was going to be downright ugly.  And I was right, I gained 2.6 pounds. I must admit that while I was prepared for a gain, I was not prepared for that gain and it sent me reeling for the rest of the day.

Yet today is another day and while I was folding laundry and watching Super Soul Sunday on OWN, I heard Martha Beck say “what you believe and what you expect is what you will get”.  That hit close to home for me as I reflected on my actions of the past month.  Because it was the holiday season, and I had a broken foot, and I was going on an all-inclusive all you can eat vacation, I expected a gain and that’s exactly what I got.

I’m not surprised by this, but I am disappointed with myself. Because I know that if I truly wanted to, I could have lost the weight. And I know that if I set out to do so, I could have maintained my weight.  It’s like when you were a kid and one of your parents instead of yelling at you gave you that look that said “you know better and I am very disappointed”. Sigh…exhale...

I know that I have more power than that mighty and majestic scale.  I know that I have the tools, the knowledge, the will, the determination, the grit and the positive attitude it takes to conquer the great confessional.  

Next week I expect to see a loss on the scale. Even though I still can’t exercise, I can control my eating habits and behaviors. I will not use the inability to exercise or any other excuse to sabotage my wellness journey.

No-one or no-thing should have power over you.

I repeat, do not give people or things power over you.

You control you.

Not others, not your past, not your future, not your circumstance.

Y-o-u control you.

Set a goal for yourself this week and know that "what you believe and expect is what you will get". 

Expect the best and amazing things will happen for you.

Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Ask for help. Continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

Why Not?

When was the last time you were truly afraid of something?

My husband and I just got back from an awesomesauce trip to St. Thomas. During our time there, a snorkeling excursion was scheduled and I gladly hesitantly went along. I’m not a big fan of getting wet or swimming, so snorkeling was kind of a no-go for me. Add to that the fact that I’m terrified of fish both large and small and you can understand why I went into the trip with a grand plan that included lounging, reading and sunbathing.

Before we boarded the boat, I had already informed my husband that I would joyfully watch him and the others snorkel, if I decided to move from my lounging, reading and sunbathing position. 

We sailed from St. Thomas to the calm, caribbean blue waters of St. John.  The boat anchored and the crew began handing out the snorkeling equipment and explaining some safety procedures. Most people on board were chatting amongst themselves and eagerly donning the snorkel gear. The views of the cliffs and reefs nearby were incredible and the water was a gorgeous blue even our camera couldn’t capture. After I assured my husband that I was fine with hanging back on the boat, he rode down the boat’s slide, arms in the air.

Once (most) everyone was in the water and off exploring, I told myself that I was perfectly content with being an observer. I stood on the deck, head raised to the sky, enjoying the glory of the warm sun combined with a cooling breeze on my skin. I watched as people explored the ocean depths in groups or alone, wondering what they were seeing. And slowly, my curiosity started to get the best of me. Maybe I was missing out on something really good? Did I want to be an observer or a participant?

I planted myself on a bench on the front of the boat and began lamenting to no-one in particular that I really wanted to snorkel, but I was terribly afraid. The nice solid bench on the boat was comforting and predictable. How could I venture into those waters not knowing what was in there? What if I saw a sting ray? Steve Irwin was an expert in his field yet died from close contact with a sting ray. What if I got too close to the black prickly sea urchins? Their poison-filled spines could make me sick and sore for days. What if I met up with an especially large fish and it could most likely swim faster than me?

My fears might sound irrational and to some silly, but at the time they kept me plastered to the bench. Yet there I was in the Carribbean, surrounded by the incredible beauty of God’s creations, with an expert crew there to support me. So after a little bit a lot of pacing, hand-wringing and pep talks, I decided to give it a go, with a few conditions of course. Condition #1- I wouldn’t “snorkel” per say, but I would go for a leisurely swim with goggles and a swim noodle. Condition #2- My husband would swim ahead of me and warn me of any “large fish” or potential danger. Condition #3- I could get out at any time and was allowed to scream like a girl because, I am one.

After sitting at the top of the slide for a while, I finally opted to slowly back down the steps and into the water. The water was warm and lovely. I peered through my goggles, checking out the sea life below and slowly made my way at a pace that suited me just fine, s-l-o-w. I will admit that my terror was not reduced much by the beauty around me but I did relax slightly and try to appreciate my surroundings. I floated about for a while until my husband took out his snorkel and said “I don’t mean to alarm you, but there is a very large fish right below you”. And that my friends, was the end of my adventure. I swam as hard and as fast as my arms and legs would take me and hastily boarded the boat.  

A few years back, as I was beginning to get myself well, physically, spiritually and emotionally, I decided that I wanted to be a WHY NOT person. I declared that if God placed a situation before me, I wouldn’t ask WHY, I would ask WHY NOT.  Easier said than done right? Yet for the most part I am proud to say that I am turning into a WHY NOT person. I have begun to view situations that are scary, challenging and new as blessings and gifts.

And I’m beginning to understand that just like the crew and equipment on the boat, God has equipped me with the talent, support and equipment for the task at hand, whatever that may be.

All I need to do is ask WHY NOT?

If there is something new you’ve been wanting to try or something overdue you’ve been meaning to face, there is no better time than now to dive in. If you’re like me, you’ll find that the worry was worse than the act itself. And you might surprise yourself and have fun along the way.

I want to be that person who slides into life feet first with my hands in the air. How about you?

Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Ask for help. Continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

WW Debunked

Have you ever been in a situation where you’re listening to someone talk and they’re…well…let’s just say…a tad ill-informed? You patiently listen as they blab on and on and on…

Wouldn’t it be awesome if just once it was socially acceptable to cut someone off in mid-conversation? Or if it was cool to roll your eyes and let out a huge sigh? 

It’s always interesting when you hear people discussing something you’re passionate about. With representation from folks like Charles Barkley, Jennifer Hudson and Jessica Simpson, Weight Watchers has been getting a lot of airtime, both on TV and in real life. A while back I was watching a daytime talk show (to go unnamed) and they were talking about Weight Watchers. It was fascinating to hear what they thought the program was about. Some of the hosts were on the money and knew a lot about the program and some made assumptions and generalizations that made me cringe.  When I’m chatting it up with people (and maybe they’re the ones rolling their eyes) about Weight Watchers, I’m really surprised about people’s impressions of the program. And while everyone is certainly entitled to their opinions, I thought I’d take a moment or two to debunk some of the things I’ve heard about the program, especially with the rollout of Weight Watchers 360. Plus, I’ve always wanted to use the word debunk, so here we go:

1) I can’t eat out. WW is designed so you can enjoy life while losing weight. On top of your daily points plus target, you get additional points plus allowance to use however you want and wherever you want. These additional points can be used on that mocha latte, drinks and appetizers at girl’s night out or for a special occasion. WW also provides tools for you to calculate the points plus values of restaurant foods, so you can make wise choices and plan accordingly. While I don’t eat out nearly as much as I used to, I eat out several times a week and I relish every tasty morsel.

2) Working the points plus system doesn’t teach me how to eat right.  This might be the most frustrating statement I hear about the program. WW has created a simplified process for calculating the value of food and has assigned points plus values to each food based on its fiber, fat, carbohydrate, protein and overall nutrition. And yes, things that are “not so healthy” such as baked goods and fried foods also have points plus values and are a part of this program. However, the very core of the program is made up of good health guidelines which are the daily recommended intake of lean proteins, fruits and vegetables, lowfat/nonfat dairy, whole grains and healthy fats. WW also emphasizes Power Foods that are high in nutrition, low in fat and make you feel fuller longer.  You will learn about making wise food choices, incorporating activity, along with behavior changes to revamp your spaces and routines.

3) I already know how to lose weight so I probably won’t learn anything new. I’ve been a WW member for 16 years and I STILL learn something new at almost every meeting. From new recipes, food substitution or preparation tips; to ways to evaluate my goals, behaviors and reinvent myself. I truly value the knowledge and support I receive from my WW leader, peers and materials.

4) I can’t afford it. For some who are financially strapped, I can appreciate your dilemma. I’ve been there, where I’ve had not one extra penny to spend, and yes there is a cost to the WW program. The program ranges in cost from $11 to $14 per week depending on your area and the plan you choose. Please consider the following when mulling over the cost of the program. Some insurance will reimburse you for the cost of the program once you reach goal. My insurance fully reimbursed me for the program and I used the money for smaller clothes. You might be spending $14 a week on lunch out with friends. Think about using that $14 for taking better care of you. Skip that lunch out with friends and take a walk with them instead. $14 is a minor cost for such an important investment- you!

5) I tried a meeting once and did NOT like it. Try again (please). I have been to a variety of meeting locations over the years; they all have their own vibe and attract different member audiences.  Every leader is different and what will appeal to some will not appeal to others.  Some leaders are serious, some no-nonsense, some funny and some hands-on.  Find a meeting location and leader that is right for you. Once you make that click with a leader and location, you will be on the fast track to a new you.

Now that I’ve told you what Weight Watchers is not, let me tell you what it is. Weight Watchers is a program designed for human nature. It’s been around for 50 years and is backed by member success and years of scientific research. It’s a program that will teach you how to make healthy food and lifestyle choices for life. It goes beyond the food to the behaviors behind and around the food.

I feel very blessed to be a part of the Weight Watchers organization, as a member and an employee. The program has changed and continues to change my life for the better.

I invite you to come along on a wellness journey with me. To learn more about WW click here.

Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Ask for help. Continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara