Wednesday, June 19, 2013

So Long Sarong

Last week, I was blessed to go on a family vacation to the beaches of South Carolina and it was absolutely wonderful!
Beach vacation---for many years of my life those two little words brought about such dread.  Beach= bathing suit.  Most times, I’d rather wear my beach bag than a bathing suit.
When I was a little girl, I was a tad chunky. I had the pleasure of shopping in the husky section, fun right? Who the heck had the grand idea to label clothing as husky? I was always the girl wearing the bathing suit with the skirt. I longed to wear a more stylish suit or even a bikini like the other girls. I had a few years as a teenager/young adult when I dieted and exercised and yes, I finally donned a bikini. Funnily enough, when I look back on those years, I was still critical of my appearance even though I looked h-o-t. We’re our own worst critics aren’t we?
I had myself a little aha moment on our vacation last week. Size and shape wise, I’m the smallest I’ve been in 12 years. I mean, a few times on vacation, I was mistaken for Jennifer Lopez. We have the same curves, I’m just a bit shorter than she is—LOL. No, seriously, this is an important aha moment, so listen up ladies (and gentlemen). As my family and I frolicked on the beach (let’s be honest here, they frolicked while I read my book), I still kept a pair of shorts on over my bathing suit. Maybe a comfort thing, maybe a modesty thing…I can’t be certain why.  What I can be certain of is this…for the first time…in a long time…I felt free on vacation. You know that Special K commercial where the woman is strolling down the beach and the wind blows her sarong off? She hesitates for a moment and then gives herself a once-over and is like uh-huh, I’m f-i-n-e.
Last week I realized that I was free. Free to be me, free to be healthy. The aha moment wasn’t about my new shape, it was about my new wellness. It was about being fit, not being thin. It was about accepting my body as it is and feeling blessed to be well. It hit me when I was carrying our beach bags and chairs.
A few years ago, I remember walking from our rental house to the beach. I was carrying our beach supplies and I was so tired I had to stop and catch my breath a few times. Everything seemed so heavy, including me. The extra pounds I was carrying were literally weighing me down. Once we were at the beach, I was down for the count. Too tired to walk and enjoy the views. Too tired to hang out with the kids. I wasn’t even forty, and I was worn out.
Last week, I felt healthy and energized. My goal was to get in an hour of activity each day. Walks on the beach were a pleasure. My mind was clear, my heart, lungs and legs were strong. Taking a bike ride was total enjoyment. Instead of looking at my watch to see how much time we rode, I looked at my watch to see how much time was left until we had to turn the bikes back in. An aside - I didn’t look at my watch, I looked at my iPhone…does anybody wear watches anymore?
All these years, I’ve been striving for a bathing suit body when what I really needed was a healthy body.

Not a perfect body. Not a tan body. Not a ripped body. (Ok, I’ll take tan and ripped if it comes my way).  A body that can run, jump, swim and play. A body that is open to having fun, sharing laughs and taking risks. A body that lets me be my best me.
It is my wish for you, as you enter this summer season, that you can say so long sarong and hello to a new you. 
Remember, every single pebble, even those buried deep in the ocean, impacts its ebb and flow. Even though you may not see results right away on the surface, every small change you make is working in your favor.   
Summer is here. Breathe it in!
Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Ask for help. Continue with courage.
Hugs and friendship,
Tara