Last week I did something a bit unexpected, I signed up for
Refit instructor training. Yes you read right, I, Tara Elizabeth Watson, signed
up to be a fitness instructor. If I wasn’t so terrified, I’d be laughing
hysterically at the thought. As I’ve shared in a previous post, I rubbed
poison ivy leaves all over my body in elementary school just to avoid field
day. Spoiler alert, I was terribly allergic! I was on first name basis with the
school nurse because of my many feigned illnesses to get out of gym class,
especially those dastardly presidential fitness tests! Over the years, fitness
has not been my forte. I did pretty much everything I could to avoid movement.
I used to lie on my couch watching the Biggest Loser whilst eating a piece of
single serve cake I had picked up from Giant. I would wander aimlessly around
the YMCA gym not knowing how to use the equipment, make a half assed effort,
leave frustrated and pick up a pack of Entenmann’s chocolate crumb donuts to eat
on the way home to make myself feel better.
I’m feeling a bit sick just thinking about the commitment
that I made. My heart is racing and I’ve started thinking of ways that I can
get out of it. I am afraid. What am I afraid of? Many things. I am an introvert
so the idea of sitting in an 8 hour training class with people I don’t know is
enough to make me run like holy heck in the opposite direction. I fear the
unknown and I usually build it up to be much worse than it ever actually is. I’m
a control freak, a researcher and a planner. I like to know everything before I
start something. Since I don’t know what the class will be like, I worry that I
won’t be able to do it. I’m afraid that my knee injury won’t hold up or that I
won’t have enough physical endurance. I fear that my ship has sailed. That I’m
too old and it’s too late for me to try something new. And as Nate (my husband)
laughs at me, I worry that people won’t come to my class once I’m certified. I’ve
always been petrified of being rejected. Why he laughs is that I’m always three
steps ahead of myself, I didn’t even go through the certification course yet
but I’m already stressing about the fact that people might not show up. *snort*
I am seriously a hot mess!
A little over a year ago, I had that same sinking feeling in
my stomach. I had taken a big leap moving from being a 20 year Weight Watcher
veteran to trying Beachbody. People that knew me were skeptical and hey I don’t
blame them. I was skeptical myself. I went from being a Weight Watcher’s
evangelist to trying something new. If you’re just getting to know me, I
blogged about my decision and then blogged weekly about my 21 day experience.
A completely unexpected turn of events came out of me trying
Beachbody, I found out that I love fitness. Let me write that again for those
who can’t believe what they are reading. I, Tara Elizabeth Watson, love to
exercise. I love how my body is getting stronger every day. I love competing
against myself. I love the sense of accomplishment that comes with completing a
workout that I couldn’t complete just a few weeks before. I love the extra
energy and stamina I am feeling. Now don’t get me wrong, are there days when I
go into slug mode and do not feel like moving? Ah, yes. But I realize that I
feel better when I move, not just physically, but emotionally.
So the question is, do I love fitness enough to get over my
fears and to take this instructor training? Perhaps not. It’s gonna take more
than that. It’s going to take faith.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your
own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”
Proverbs 3:5-6
My God is bigger than my fears. Period. I know this. I also
know that everything that has led me to this moment and to this decision is God
given. This past year and a half has been filled with circumstance after
circumstance that have intertwined me with people to get me here. I could not
have dreamt of this path on my own. I started a faith based wellness class at
my church which led me to meet my current Beachbody coach Erica. I said yes to
trying Beachbody. I signed up to be a Beachbody coach. I started to grow my
team. One of my coaches introduced me to one of her clients. This client does
Refit. I wrote for Grace & Such and one of my writing colleagues also does
Refit. Something about Refit grabbed my attention. I feel like this is the next
step for me and all I can do is trust in God’s direction. God put the desire in
my heart to become a Refit instructor and to start a wellness revolution in our
area. So that’s what I’m doing.
I may fall, but with God as my safety net, I
know that I will land on solid ground.
Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Continue with courage.
Hugs and friendship,
Tara
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