Lumps are for Potatoes, Not Breasts

That’s right you read correctly, lumps are for potatoes, not breasts. Well, truth be told, I like my potatoes smooth and creamy, but if push comes to shove, I’ll take lumps in my potatoes over my breasts any day!

A few weeks ago I went to my GYN because I was having constant pain and soreness in my left breast. Upon examination, she found a series of little lumps. This led to a mammogram and ultrasound to check things out. And oh what fun that is! As I sat in the Phoenixville hospital, anxiously awaiting my results, several things came to mind.

My Mom. My Mom died at age 31 from Hodgekin’s Lymphoma which had spread to her breasts and other parts of her body. Back in the early 80’s can-cer (as whispered in the movie St. Elmo’s Fire) was something there wasn’t a lot of research about nor were there many cures. So as I sat there in my over-exposed state, I gave a little shout out to my Mom and how much I missed her. I also gave thanks for how far we’ve come with cancer prevention and treatment and how many lives are saved each year.

Cancer survivors. The weeks leading up to my tests I was so scared and while I tried not to worry, I still did. I know some truly incredible cancer survivors. I can’t imagine the hell that they and their families went through during that time. They are my absolute heroes. One of my colleagues is going through cancer right now. I don’t know him well, because we work virtually and he has been sick since I started with the company but his wife writes this amazing blog. It’s candid, heart-wrenching, funny, painful and inspiring. One of my favorites is titled “Dear Cancer, I Hate You and I Thank You”, to read more click here. In this particular blog, she writes that we should do epic shit, because it matters. Even though I’ve never met her, her words touched me, even as I sat in the hospital waiting room.

My health. As I sat waiting for the doctor to come out and talk to me about my results, I couldn’t help but to give thanks for my good health. I thought to myself “if this is a not-so-good diagnosis, at least I’m facing it with my best foot forward”.  I am sincerely grateful that I am well. I am emotionally and physically fit. Not like six pack abs fit, but you know what I mean---healthy. Healthy organs and muscles. Healthy blood pressure and cholesterol.   Healthy mind and spirit. I am in a good place. I feel energized, happy and continue to count my blessings every single day.

The good news? My tests results came back free and clear and my diagnosis can be treated with vitamin E and a few other regimens. Excuse me while I whine for a brief moment about the fact that one of those other regimens is reducing chocolate AND caffeine. There are some things a girl just can’t live without…we’ll see.

Life is precious, don’t waste what you've been given.   

Give thanks for where you are in your wellness journey and take another step forward. 

Take one small step at a time and before you know it, you'll be amazed at how far you've come.

Ask for help. Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

The Buddy System

It’s drilled into us from a very young age to use the buddy system. In pre-school and kindergarten, we hold a friends hand (or a rope) while walking in line. In elementary school, we bring a buddy along in the hallways going from class to class. As teenagers and young adults, our parent’s encourage us to bring a friend when going someplace new or after dark. We go along with this system because it makes us feel safe, prepared and cared for.

Then…we become adults and we’re all like “pfff, I got this”! Why is it that sometimes when we’re facing challenges we won’t ask for help? How about when it comes to weigh loss? Why do we feel that we need to tackle such a huge life change alone?

My husband has been my support system since day one, doing whatever it takes to ensure I succeed. He’s been my biggest cheerleader, a shoulder to cry on and someone to vent to. Yet most times it’s been all about me and not so much about us living a healthy lifestyle together. Last March, my husband joined Weight Watcher’s online and since then he’s lost 27 pounds! He’s one pound from goal! I am extremely proud of his hard work and commitment to wellness. His sleep apnea is gone! His blood pressure and cholesterol numbers which were creeping up are back to normal levels. It’s so cool to watch the changes he’s made in his lifestyle and it makes my weight loss a lot easier to sustain. He and I have been together for 23 years and we’re the healthiest we’ve ever been.  I love how we’ve re-vamped our eating, cooking healthier versions of our favorite foods. I enjoy that our dates and even our vacations don’t need to revolve around food anymore; instead we try and do something active like hiking or biking.  

As the holidays approach, it's the perfect time to recruit someone to go through the weight loss process with you. It doesn’t have to be a spouse. It could be co-worker, friend or close family member. Maybe it’s someone sitting next to you in your Weight Watcher’s meeting or worshipping with you at church? It could be your parent or child. Your support person doesn’t necessarily need to live close by, not with all of the social media tools we have. A few weeks ago I met a mother that was losing weight with her daughter and they didn’t even live in the same state. They checked in with each other daily and they had certain goals they held each other accountable for. If they met their goals, they treated each other to meet up for fun outings. I loved hearing the way they partnered up to tackle such a big life change together. The buddy system was working for them.

You might be thinking, well that’s fine and dandy Tara, but broaching this subject is… ah---a bit awkward. Do I say “hey, I’m a little fluffy and I see you are too…wanna be my wellness buddy?” Perhaps you could say something more like “I’m really struggling with my weight and I could use your help. Would you be interested in holding me accountable or maybe even doing a program with me?” If that’s still a little too risky, start with an exercise class you’ve been wanting to try and ask someone to go along with you.

And remember, your wellness buddy could be someone who has already lost the weight. They might be just the resource you need to support your success.

Pastor Rick Warren said “we are made to get well in community with each other”. Think about that. As humans, our creator made us to partner with each other. To celebrate our joys and face challenges together.

We are made to love, support and encourage each other.  We’re not intended to go it alone.  

Ask for help. Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

C’mon In, the Water’s Fine

When you’re standing on the end of that diving board, toes wrapped around the edge to keep you from falling in, and you jump- one of three things can happen. 1) The water is f-f-f-reezing and you leap out, grab your towel and head for safety. 2) The water is f-f-f-reezing, but you decide to stay in and let your body get used to it. 3) The water is far warmer than you expected and much to your surprise, you’re having fun.

Somewhere between numbers two and three is exactly how I felt last Tuesday when I led my first Weight Watcher’s meeting. Upon walking through the meeting room doors and chatting with the receptionist (who was actually my field manager filling in for the receptionist), my body started to thaw out and relax. I took a few minutes to acquaint myself with the space, gather my materials, post my flip charts and write my name on the board- tonight’s leader is…Tara Watson! Modern Family fans, picture the slow goth clap that Cam received on his first night back as a music teacher. J

As the members started coming in, I had the opportunity to chat with them at the great confessional, the scale. I’ve done it myself, hopped on that scale and went into a monologue about what I did right that week and how I might have screwed up, all while waiting in anguish to see what the scale had to say.  It was really awesome and surprisingly intimate to share that weigh-in moment with each person.

Weight Watcher’s allows some time for members to weigh-in before the meeting starts, so I pecked back and forth between the scale and the meeting space like a nervous mother hen. As an introvert, I’m not a big work the room fan, yet hanging out in the meeting space before it started and getting to know people on a deeper level was really inspiring.

One of my biggest fears was a lack of attendance because- a) when people see a sub they usually don’t stay for the meeting and b) it was election night and c) the weather was cold and crappy. Our field manager mentioned that historically not many people come out on election night, and indeed this was the case. Seven people stayed for the meeting (talk about your confidence booster) and out of those seven, half were new. This made for quite a challenging learning environment. With so many new members, the room was fairly quiet.

I did my best to walk them through the meeting topic which was about Power Foods- foods that are high in fiber and low in fat- healthy and satisfying. I stuck with the election theme and went through a voting exercise about which Power Foods they would vote for and we closed with a lead-in to Thanksgiving. All in all, I think it went well. I was admittedly nervous and at one point I thought my throat might close up (thank God for bottled water). 

It wasn’t until after the meeting that I could step back and appreciate how much I enjoyed my time with that group of people. I learned just as much from them as they (hopefully) learned from me. Their eyes told their stories. Some were weary and hesitant. Some were pissed or perplexed about a weight gain. Others were curious and open. Some were confident and excited.

What really got me is the grit, determination and dedication it takes to make a change and stick with it. I was proud to be a small part of that change and I’m so glad I jumped into the pool- because as it turns out, the water was just fine.

Ask for help. Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

I Jumped

Back in July, which seems like forever ago, I posted that I had submitted my application to become a Weight Watcher’s Leader. The post was about taking risks and challenging yourself to try something new. If you missed it, click here.

Well, this past Tuesday night I took that jump AND I lived to tell about it. The week leading up to my first meeting was such a monkey on my back. As a matter of fact, when I was prepping for my meeting, I had mentioned to my husband that I was going to wear our son’s stuffed monkey on my back to the meeting and make a little joke about it. I thought it might be a good ice breaker, but he said I might want to tone it down a bit.

The day of the meeting I went into full panic mode. I started to think about what tragic event I would need to conjure up to get out of it. I mean seriously, don’t put anything past me. In elementary school, I was a chubby kid and I DREADED field day. A whole day dedicated to athleticism and sportsmanship- who needs it! So what did I do? I rubbed poison ivy leaves all over my body (I kid you not) in hopes to get out of field day, and did I ever! As it turns out, I was allergic. By the time that poison ivy was done with me, there wasn’t a part of my body that was spared. My eyes and throat swelled closed,  even my more private areas didn’t find safety. I ended up in the ER and got a few shots, but hey, I missed field day. Too drastic?

As I was driving to the meeting center, I considered a poison ivy regimen, but it was too late in the game for that- drats! How on earth was I going to get out of this? Food poisoning? A minor fender bender? A slip and fall? Argh, none of those ideas sounded rational. Yet who needs rational in a time of panic? I did. So I turned to the one person who never fails- the big man above.

Earlier in the week, I was watching Pastor Joel Osteen on OWN (yep still getting my Oprah fix). Now whether you like Pastor Osteen or you think he’s an over hyped televangelist, he’s got some good things to say. And one of the things he said that stuck with me is this-

 “it takes just as much energy to worry as it does to believe”.

Hollah! Why on earth was I worrying and stressing when I could simply believe that everything was going to be OK? Having faith (in God, in yourself, in others) is such a gift. If I believe that God has a plan for me (and I do), and that everything in my life has led up to this very moment and has prepared me for this path (and it has), why on earth was I in such a tizzy?

Although I was so nervous I thought I might- a) pass out or b) throw up or c) poop my pants, I started to calm myself down with prayer and deep gulps of breath.

What’s the worst that can happen? If this were my kids preparing for a big event, what would I tell them?

I was made to be a Weight Watcher’s leader.

I want to help others change their lives, one small step at a time.

My desire to help others far surpasses my fears and self-doubts.

God has prepared me for this day.

So then, after whining to my husband one last time---I gathered my wits, grabbed my materials and walked through those Weight Watcher’s meeting room doors.

Thanks to my family, friends and readers, for coming along on this journey with me, for encouraging me to take this jump. I can’t wait to share with you how the meeting went.

So come back next week and check out my post “C’mon in, the water’s fine”.

Ask for help. Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

Take 5 High Five

Why is it that when someone says “Take 5” I immediately conjure up images of a candy bar? You know, that scrumptious chocolate bar filled with caramel and pretzels and ooey- gooey deliciousness? Man, I could go for one of them right about now. Did someone say Halloween candy???

Today’s Weight Watchers meeting was about Taking 5. Not the candy bar…and no, not taking 5 pieces of candy. It was about taking five minutes for yourself each day to do a little self-reflection. This was such a timely message for me, I am SO glad I got out of bed and rolled into the meeting on this cold, blustery day.

I hadn’t been to a meeting in 3 weeks. As a Lifetime Member, I am only “obligated” to weigh in once a month. My goal is to attend every other week to make sure I’m staying on track. This is the first weigh-in, in quite some time that I gained. Oh you poor thing some might say, you’re four pounds below your goal weight and you gained. Admittedly I am under my goal weight and it feels fantastic, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t struggle every single day to make good choices.

The meeting today was about taking five minutes every day to do a self-assessment and I am going to put this into practice immediately. If you have a goal you are working toward, weight loss or otherwise, it’s extremely important to check in with yourself and honestly (sometimes painfully) assess how it’s going. Often times, we self-reflect after a failure thinking “well, I royally screwed that up”. And then we start to make a mental list of things we did wrong and before we know it, we’re so peeved that we don’t even want to try anymore.

How about a new approach? Take five minutes every day and write down what you are doing well. Give yourself a take five high five! Write down how awesome you are at something, anything. Maybe you took the time to plan out your day or you drank water. Perhaps you tried a new food or squeezed in an activity into an already a jam-packed day. Maybe you had only half a dessert or skipped the appetizer when out with friends. Or you made it through a really tough work day without turning to food. Whatever is was, write it down!

Next ask yourself, what can I do better? Once again write it down. What are you struggling with? What is one simple change you can make to get better? How can you put the change into action? For me, the small change is tracking my food again. After 15+ years of writing down what I eat, sometimes it becomes tiresome and I stop tracking. I say things to myself like “I know this! I got this!” But…I don’t. For me, writing down what I eat is super important to my long term success. It helps me stay in control and aware of the choices I’m making.

Lastly, assess the goal itself. What’s my goal? Is my goal the same as it was 6 months ago? What I’ve found is that my goals and motivations have changed throughout my weight loss process. Several times I’ve needed to refocus on what matters most to me and how I’m going to get there. I’m at that place right now; it’s time to re-assess what’s important to me.

Today’s meeting was a great reminder that I need to take the time each day to ask myself:  

What did I do well? What can I do better? What is my goal? Has it changed? How am I going to do to get there?

Ask for help. Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

Win, Lose or Draw

Ok, so don’t freak out…but we are a mere 6 weeks from Turkey Day. Yep, the day that is specifically designed for pajama jeans. I mean, who doesn’t want to wear pajama jeans to Thanksgiving dinner? With their incredibly stretchy waist band, we can certainly eat an extra piece of pumpkin pie, or three.

We are about to head into a blur of holiday activities that leaves our tummies full, our heads spinning and our wallets empty. For many years as a person who struggles with over-indulging, I absolutely dreaded the holiday season. The idea of being surrounded by food, not just food but scrumptious food, was just too much to handle. So here is what I did. Right around this time of year, the week before Halloween, as I began to bust open the Halloween candy bags, I would quit. My thoughts would go something like this “well…I think I’ll take a little break from my healthy eating and I’ll get back on track after the holidays…yeah…that’s what I’ll do…I’ll let myself eat whatever I want and then I’ll be such a good girl come January….in January, I’ll be a saint…a wellness guru…it’s just too hard to stay on track during the holidays…I want to enjoy what I eat…and there are way too many events to stay in control …yeah…January…”

Sound familiar? Every single year, never fail, I stopped my wellness plan in late October and like a big ol’ mama bear…I went into hibernation for a while.

But wait! It doesn’t have to be this way! I don’t mean to scare you, but there are 10 weeks until Christmas. Do you realize that if you stayed on track with your wellness regimen during the holiday season you could lose 5-20 pounds over those 10 weeks? How does that sound to you? Actually losing weight over the holidays? But wait! You have some other options.  

Anyone remember the game show Win, Lose or Draw? OK, I’m dating myself here. When I Googled the words win, lose or draw, I fell in love with one of the Yahoo answers. What does it mean when someone says win, lose or draw? One of the answers was “it means to get on with the contest and accept whatever results may ensue. The only possibilities are win, lose or draw”.

I love that! Why? It has become my approach when faced with the holiday season. For me, tackling the holidays head on is about strategy and choice. You have several choices, and they’re yours to make. You can decide that you want to lose weight during the holidays and stick with your wellness regimen throughout the holiday season. This might look like making mostly healthy food choices, exercising, and maybe indulging a bit on the actual holiday itself. You can choose to maintain at your current weight during the holidays.  Maybe this means for you that you’ll eat a bit more, have some of those dee-lish cocktails, but still exercise and maintain control overall of what you eat and drink. You can decide to allow yourself to gain a bit over the holidays, knowing that you can and will get back on track.

What I love about the definition of win, lose and draw above is the part about accepting whatever results may ensue. Isn’t that what this is all about? Your choice will lead to an action that will lead to a result. The result is purely up to you.

Envision where you want to be in January. Do you want to be thinner? Maintain? Or are you OK with gaining a bit of weight?

Develop a strategy and stick to it.

Feel good about the choices you’re making because YOU are in control.

When you develop a plan and take control, it’s not a win, lose or draw--- it’s a win-win!

Ask for help. Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

My Mother's Eyes

“For attractive lips, speak words of kindness.
For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people.
For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry.
For beautiful hair, let a child run their fingers through it once a day.
For poise, walk with the knowledge that you never walk alone.
People, more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed. Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, you will find one at the end of each of your arms.
As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands, one for helping yourself and the other for helping others.” ― Sam Levenson

With Thanksgiving fast approaching, I cannot help but to give thanks for life. I used to be a little more diligent about this than I am now. For quite some time I kept a gratitude journal next to my bed and every night I added something new. Our daily lives whiz by in a blur and I think it’s extremely important to begin and end each day grounded in just how blessed we are.

As I began to think about gratitude, my mind wrestled with the fact that there is one thing that I continue to struggle to appreciate, my physical appearance. Isn’t it crazy that for most of us, our shape, size, eye color, hair color, skin texture…just isn’t quite enough?

Over the next week, I’d like you to join me in a gratitude exercise. Take out a piece of paper, post-it note, index card- something portable- and write down 3 things that you like about your physical appearance. Yes, 3 things! You can do it! And just to get you started, I’m going to share mine with you.

1) My eyes. A few years ago, when I had my eye exam, my eye doctor mentioned that I have a beautiful circle of gold around my pupils. Her word beautiful, not mine. Now I have certainly never really noticed anything spectacular about my plain ol’ hazel eyes, yet since she’s mentioned it I sometimes find myself glimpsing in the mirror and thinking “how about that? I do have gold around my pupils, that’s pretty special.”  I also very much appreciate that I have my mother’s eyes. My Mom died when I was 11. I don’t have many memories of her, nor do I particularly resemble her. Yet I definitely have my mother’s eyes, and sometimes when I look into them, I can see her looking back at me.

2) My legs. For the longest time, I viewed my legs as two stumps at the end of my torso, certainly nothing to write home about. Yet as I get older, I truly appreciate all of the work my legs do for me every single day without fail. They’ve carried my weight, no matter my size. They allow me to do fun activities like dancing, Zumba and hiking. My legs have helped me to tirelessly run after my kids, to walk in 5K’s to support a friend or to endlessly explore a pumpkin patch until we found THE perfect pumpkin. My legs might be short, but they’re strong and they support me.

3) My hips. Now this is a tough one. For most of my life, I have really despised my hips. It doesn’t matter how much weight I lose, I have wide hips. My Aunt calls them birthing hips, very funny (not). What I’ve found over the years, is that my hips are just right, just as they are. My Gran was a bigger woman, and I  used to love sitting on her lap and sinking into her curves that were made just for a grandchild to fit into. Well, the same goes for these hips of mine. They balance kids and grocery bags like nobody’s business. My kid’s always fit perfectly perched on one of my hips. I am thankful to have a spot that was meant just for them to snuggle into.

So now it’s your turn. Tonight before you go to sleep or tomorrow morning when you wake up, take some time to reflect about what makes you uniquely you. Write it down. Post those words on your desk or your refrigerator; maybe on your car or bathroom mirror. Read the words out loud. 

Believe them. Live them. Give thanks for them.

Be thankful for who are you, you are just as God created you to be.

Ask for help. Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara