Begin Again

Two years ago, on a cold blustery March day, I opened up my laptop and started writing. I guess it’s kind of like having teen angst and jotting everything down in a journal except I’m not a teenager (thank the good Lord) and teens don't typically use the word jot. 

Desperate times call for desperate measures, and boy was I desperate.  I was stuck and frustrated. I could not get the scale to move in my favor. I had gained back over half of the weight I had lost and maintained for such a long time. I was ashamed.

There I was, a Lifetime member of Weight Watchers since 1997, looking in the mirror and the eyes that looked back at me were filled with self- loathing.  How could I have let this happen? When did it happen? Why did it happen? I knew what to do. I knew how to be successful on the program.  For many years I was dialed-in, laser-focused on my goals. And then…life happened.

Oh, I could blame this, that or some other thing. I could say I gained weight because of a stressful job transition. Or because I was working and going to school full time while trying to be a wife, Mom, friend---you get the picture. I could say I gained weight because I was battling a chronic and painful illness.

The reality is that I gained weight because of all of those things, in combination with the fact that:

I’m human.

I make mistakes.

I love to eat.

Plus many, many, MANY other simple AND complex reasons.

On March 26, 2011, I wrote my first blog post. I decided to publicly share my words with anyone who would read them to hold myself accountable during my wellness journey.  And I must say, it’s both humbling and gratifying to be able to see my progress, not just the physical changes, but the emotional changes I’ve gone through.

Fast forward to today, and I’m proud to say I’m not only at goal, I’m 8 pounds below my goal.

And the best part? As a Weight Watchers leader, I now have the privilege of helping others reach their goals.

Often times, I meet people who are at the exact same spot I was at two years ago. Sometimes, it seems like they are looking to me for a magical answer to their road back to wellness.  The best advice I can give is this- DO NOT GIVE UP!!!

This advice isn’t meant to be trite or cliché. It’s a heart-felt plea to keep on keepin’ on. If I could take their hand and look into their eyes I would say with all sincerity- please do not stop now. I will meet you wherever you are in your journey and will do whatever it takes to help you succeed.

Tired and broken. Lost and weary. Frustrated and scared. I’ve been there. Angry and self-deprecating. On the brink of giving up. I’ve been there. Exasperated beyond belief. I’ve been there. 

Your Weight Watchers leaders and peers can help you because not only have they been there, they are now here. And being here, at goal, feels so darned amazing.  

Being here means we didn’t give up on ourselves. Being here means knowing we are worth the work. It means that we are living our best lives. Being here means we did not stop.

Being here has led to joy, increased energy, a willingness to take risks, laughter, confidence, self-forgiveness, the courage to try new things, contentment and pride. 

Being here means NEVER forgetting that I was there.

And sometimes, being here means knowing how to begin again.   

Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Ask for help. Continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara