Overcoming My (Food) Addiction

As promised, I wanted to share what I have learned during my weight loss journey from Weight Watcher’s (and many others).  

1) Acceptance. I accept that I am addicted to food. I understand that I will battle my weight for life. I recognize that I am prone to be overweight, but I don’t have to be. Acknowledging a weakness doesn’t make you more flawed, it helps light that spark needed to move beyond it.  

2) Accountability. I know that to be successful I need to be accountable to someone for my actions. I heard Rick Warren say “we are made to get well in community with each other” and that really hit home for me. I can’t do this alone. In blogging, I have made my battle public, choosing to have many people hold me accountable. In addition, my husband is my number one accountability partner. He keeps my head on straight, not just with weight loss, but with life. Whether you choose one person, or a whole group of people, you need support. Find someone to keep it real with you.

3) Absolution. Losing weight, like many things in life, is filled with ups and downs. I realize that berating myself for messing up is very unhealthy. Throughout your weight loss and maintenance journey, there will be highs and lows. And if you haven’t heard me say a million times in my blog, life happens. Don’t let a temporary set-back become permanent. Take a deep breath, forgive yourself and move forward.  

4) Awareness. I am aware of the food I put in my body and I keep track of it. I am mindful of what I eat. I choose to make healthy choices (well most of the time). I savor the food I am given. One of my goals on my goal board is to honor God with my body. God only gave me one body and for many years I thumbed my nose at him by not taking care of it. Be mindful of the choices you make.

5) Activity. The more I move my body the better I feel. And quite honestly, the more I exercise, the less junk I want to eat. Why? Because when I work out hard for an hour, I don’t want to come home and eat a sleeve of Oreos, it totally defeats the purpose. Well, let’s face it, I might want to eat the whole sleeve of Oreos (especially if they're double stuffed), but I don’t. Being active is a privilege that some people do not have. Instead of saying I HAVE to exercise, try saying I WANT to exercise or I GET to exercise.

6) Achievement. Set goals and celebrate your achievements. Set big crazy goals and smaller more maintainable goals. Post them in a place where you can see them each day. Let your accountability partner or group know what your goals are, and report back to them on your progress. Remember that small goals can add up to big results.

7) Appreciation. Never a day goes by that I do not give thanks in the beginning and end of my day that I am able to live a healthy life. Be thankful for your journey, the highs and the lows. Be grateful that you have the opportunity and the ability to make positive changes in your life. Every day is a fresh start!

Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

Addicted (To Food)

A few weeks ago, I was chatting with my acupuncturist K, about food addiction. We were talking about why our culture does not really accept the reality of being addicted to food?  With obesity and obesity-related illnesses on an alarming rise, why is food addiction not regarded by most people as a real addiction?

When it comes to alcohol, drugs and tobacco addiction, rarely do you hear people say things like “he just needs to have more willpower” or “she needs to take control of the situation” or “that person is just weak” or “he doesn’t want it bad enough”. Yet when it comes to food addiction, many people believe that over-eaters can just flip some mental switch and voila- they can stop eating.

I remember during my conversation with K, I said “I don’t even like to talk about food addiction, it’s like a dirty little secret that makes me feel bad if I say it out loud”.  Food addiction, like every other addiction, can make a person feel ashamed, lost, powerless and hopeless.  For me, it’s such a dark place to go back to those feelings that compel me to overeat. I have not once, in my past year of blogging addressed the fact that I am, indeed, addicted to food. So for the premise of full transparency, and with the purpose of helping myself and others, here goes. This and my next blog post will be dedicated to airing my food addiction and how Weight Watcher’s has helped me to overcome this addiction.

As I write these words, I’m feeling a little squirmy in my seat. This is really tough for me to write. I have been addicted to food for as long as I can remember. It has been my best friend and enemy all in one.  Ever since I was a little girl, holding my Hostess powdered donettes in my clutches like some kids hold their teddy bears tight. As a child, food fed my deepest hurts, from my parents multiple divorces, to having to be shuffled around households, to the deaths of my dearest loved ones, to feeling utterly alone. I ate (and ate, and ate) to feed the pain I was feeling and to gain temporary happiness.

By the time I reached young adulthood, these habits grew with me. Food became my everything; best friend, stress relief, partner in crime. And it still is today.  I eat to celebrate, to mourn. I eat when I achieve, when I’m under stress. I eat socially and in private. I eat to cope and to enjoy. I eat when I’m sad and when I’m happy. Simply put, I eat.

Yet here’s the great news! You don’t have to feel ashamed, lost, powerless and hopeless. No matter if you make it a private or public decision, you CAN change your life. Whether you turn to Weigh Watcher’s, Overeater’s Anonymous, Jenny Craig, a nutritionist, medical professional, a food therapist or a spiritual leader, you CAN change your life. No matter if you’re 5 pounds or 200 pounds overweight, you CAN change your life. Whether you do it alone or in a group, you CAN change your life.  No matter your age, you CAN change your life. An old dog can indeed be taught new tricks.

You do not have to feel ashamed, lost, powerless or hopeless. You can feel proud, inspired, in control, and full of joy. I may have a food addiction for life, but that doesn’t mean I can’t change my life. And I have. Stay tuned for my next post, Overcoming (Food) Addiction.

Ask for help. Make the choice. Commit to the choice. Continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

Taming Your Gremlins

I love to read and I read about a book a week, anything from spiritual to weight loss to fiction to business to steamy romances. Most books I pass along, but I have two bookshelves of my keepers. These are my go to books. One of my go to books is called Taming Your Gremlin by Rick Carson. I love the rest of the title, A Surprisingly Simple Method for Getting Out of Your Own Way. Isn’t that a great statement? I can’t tell you how many times I have been my own road block to success.

This book is a simple, practical read. Very easy to apply and understand. I would even recommend it to teenagers who are growing into themselves to help them with self-reflection, monitoring and change. So what’s it all about? It’s about tuning in to what you believe about yourself, whether it’s true or not. Being aware of the messaging you repeatedly think about who you are.  The negative thoughts and messages we send from our brains to our hearts can be limiting and damaging to ourselves and those around us. I love the books depiction of this negative messaging, a nasty, sneaky little gremlin. This gremlin trips up even our best of intentions. Just when we’re feeling good about ourselves, the gremlin creeps up, maybe even drawing on a bad experience from our childhood and whammo, puts us back in our place. That ugly little gremlin tells us we’re not enough. Good enough, smart enough, pretty enough, thin enough, energetic enough, young enough, wealthy enough-perfect enough. We’re not a good parent, partner, son/daughter, friend, church-goer, co-worker. It taunts us to go ahead and try, but you’re not going to succeed.

But we can AND WILL succeed in whatever we’re trying to accomplish if only we could get control of those gremlins. The book not only talks about being aware of our gremlins, but gives ways to control and eliminate them. My favorite visual of the book is squashing the gremlins. Bam- squash those life draining gremlins- dead! Stop them in their tracks!

Last night, as I was watching my favorite ABC line up, The Middle, Suburgatory and Modern Family, I was reminded of just how quickly those gremlins can arise from the dead. If you haven’t seen Suburgatory, it is a show designed to poke fun at just how ridiculous our society has become. It’s set in a cookie cutter wealthy neighborhood suburb of NYC. The characters are over the top. Plastic surgery is the norm, money and country club living is a must and the writers really over-emphasize stereo types. The whole notion of the show is ludicrous, but it’s so ludicrous, it’s funny. I’ve been watching the show since it aired, but last night, I found myself comparing me to Dallas (Cheryl Hines) one of the main characters in the show. Dallas is a size nothing, with a surgically enhanced body and face, Chiclet white teeth, a fake and bake tan, with long blonde (extensions) hair. She’s always dressed to the nines and sporting some fabulous jewelry. Usually I find Dallas endearing and comical. But last night she brought out my gremlins.

I began to think negatively about myself. I’m not…good enough, smart enough, pretty enough, thin enough, energetic enough, young enough, wealthy enough-perfect enough…

But here’s the good news people, something I am proud to write, I squashed those gremlins like a bug. One of the greatest things about the human mind is our power to change our thoughts and actions. I WAS NOT going to let those gremlins make me feel less than. I was aware of the gremlin, I acknowledged the gremlin and then, I dismissed the gremlin.  I WILL NOT let anyone, or anything make me feel less than. I AM enough.

If the creator of the universe thinks you’re enough, be still and accept it, you ARE enough. Don’t let your gremlins be a road block to your success.

Make the choice, commit to the choice and continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

Quick Note to R

Hi R!
I hope you made it to my blog, because I think I gave you the wrong address. Sorry!
Here is the post I was referring to:
http://chewingthefatonskinny.blogspot.com/2011/12/limitless-part-ii.html
I'm SO glad you came back to Weight Watcher's this morning.
You look radiant and continue to be an inspiration to many (even if you don't know it).
Keep on keepin' on!
Tara

Ain't No Stopping Me Now

That’s right! Ain’t no stopping me now, I’m on the move! This week, just when I needed it most, I find myself re-energized and re-focused and let me tell you it feels great! My mind and body feel like a cloud blew over and out popped the sun. There are a few people that have given me this extra spring in my step this week.

1- My colleague, Bill Rust, wrote a blog titled “How’s That New Year’s Resolution Coming Along?”  Now while I’m not new a new year’s resolution kind of gal, his post about change really resonated with my weight loss journey. I love that Bill talks about doing a gut check. When you’re in the middle of doing something for a while, and you’re not quite seeing the results you’re looking for, check in with yourself. Are you still inspired? Has your goal changed? Is it even important to you anymore? Why? Does it need to be modified based on your current life circumstance? Take a moment to read Bill’s post, it’s a poignant reminder about how the emotions behind change can impact your results and ways to take a look at how modifying your thinking can affect your journey, wherever you plan to go. Nf5 Blog- Bill Rust

2- The topic of our Weight Watcher’s meeting this morning was Anchoring.  Similar to what Bill referenced, our emotions play a huge part in our ability and willingness to change. Anchoring is when you use a mental or physical object or image to keep you focused on your goal.  I love the idea of anchoring and I have several things I do to keep myself on track (to be shared in a later blog post). Our leader Janet gave some fantastic and practical examples of why anchoring is so important to help us achieve our long term goals. She also spoke about what actions and mindsets are needed for success. One thing that Janet shared really hit home for me. She shared a story of one of her lifetime members who is examining the process of change. And that “the pain in doing nothing must be greater than the change itself”. Not a direct quote…J

Eureka! That insight, in combination with Bill’s post, set the sun-a-shinin’ in my cloud filled week. When I first started Weight Watcher’s, the pain (physical and emotional) was greater; it was great enough for me to HAVE to make a change. I was at the end of my rope, and like many, was willing to do anything to make a change. And slowly but surely I did. Fast forward 15 years. I have (mostly) maintained my weight loss, albeit up and down a few pounds. Yet lately I find my motivation waning. I’m only 2.8 pounds from my goal weight and those 2.8 pounds are not enough pain to help me finish what I started. And that’s the big idea here for me, as Oprah calls it, my aha moment.

I need to re-examine my motivation. What once inspired me to change is not the same now. I am a different person now and h-e-l-l-o, that means my desire and reasons for change are different. Can you feel my excitement about this discovery? It’s like someone flipped a light switch in my brain. I can’t wait to start my planning and to fully focus on what and where I want to be, now and in the future.

This week, I challenge you to question what motivates you? Really think about your goals, weight loss and otherwise. Evaluate your plan to get there and adjust as needed. Imagine that anchor holding you in place with just the right amount of flexibility and strength to reach your goal.

Make the choice, commit to the choice and continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

Life Happens

Even the best laid out plans…well, you know the saying…the best laid out plans…they can get messed up sometimes…On my goal board in my home office, I had the date of March 26^th, that was my magic goal date and alas it is April 4^th and April Fool’s---I didn’t hit my goal.

As I mentioned in a previous post, I am still on exercise restriction from my surgery. Taking away exercise from me is like taking away my drug of choice. I use exercise to control my neuralgia, to reduce stress and to improve my mood. And oh yeah, I use exercise to lose weight. At this point in the game, being so close to my goal weight, it is getting increasingly more difficult to get the scale to move. I really count on the extra burn of exercise to lose weight.

And by the way, did I mention that my son broke his nose last week? Yep, did a nice doozy on it, he’s scheduled for surgery next week. So what’s a girl to do when everyday life gets in the way? Life happens. We don’t have the luxury of an uninterrupted weight loss journey like a contestant on The Biggest Loser.  They’ve got the BL chefs, the BL trainers, a BL nutritionist, 24 hour access to fitness equipment, and the ability to work out for 6 hours a day.

But here’s the deal-e-o, we are in real life. Our days start before we even wake up, continued from the night before as our never-ending to-do lists turn over in our minds. And as we jet out of bed we think about the day ahead while getting kids ready for school, reminding them to pack up their sports equipment, reviewing the after school pick up plans, packing lunches all while trying to make ourselves presentable for the day. If we’re lucky, we get a quick chat in with our spouse to plan out the evening and then one-two-three-break, it’s time to start our work days and it’s only 8am. And while we work we’re thinking about what needs to be done after work. Envision a million little post it notes popping up in our minds…Who needs to be taxied where? Was there a birthday? Was I supposed to call someone? Did I move that doctor appointment? And lest we neglect our volunteer commitments, those cupcakes we got sucked into making or the car wash we are coordinating. And don’t forget the heavier commitments like caring for sick loved ones, nursing someone who is feeling a loss or guiding our kids through their individual life challenges. Phew- are we exhausted yet? Did our fitness and well- being ever enter our minds?

What can we do when life happens and it feels like life itself is more than we can handle let alone eating right and exercising?

We can stay the course. Life is an exchange of give and take. Our focus will shift from us, to our kids, to our friends, back to us, to our spouses, to God, to our work, to our hobbies, back to us, to our parents…

Just stay the course and do what you can with the time and with the resources you’ve been given. And that will be enough. Breathe. Slow down. Squeeze in 10 minutes for yourself where you can. And then rinse and repeat. Don’t lose focus on your well-being but understand that sometimes that focus will shift, your wellness journey might slip and if it does, forgive yourself, brush off and forge ahead.

Spring is the best time to start anew!

Make the choice, commit to the choice and continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara