You Are Enough

I was watching Elizabeth Gilbert (the author of Eat, Pray, Love) on Oprah’s Life Class, and I was really impacted by what she had to say. She spoke about a variety of topics but what really stuck with me was one of her daily mantras- you are enough. Gilbert is quoted in saying “The Yogic sages say that all the pain of a human life is caused by words, as is all the joy. We create words to define our experience and those words bring attendant emotions that jerk us around like dogs on a leash. We get seduced by our own mantras (I'm a failure... I'm lonely... I'm a failure... I'm lonely...) and we become monuments to them.”

How extremely powerful are the words we say and think. They can build us up or break us down. They can define us, refine us, limit us or set us free. Yet it’s not the words themselves, but the emotions behind the words, and this is especially true when it comes to how we talk and think about our physical appearance.

What if, no matter the stage of life we were in, we told ourselves that we were enough? Not good enough, smart enough or strong enough---simply enough.

Have you ever looked back at a picture and thought “wow, I looked really good then”? Yet at the time, you thought you could have looked better?

My husband always says if there is one gift that he could give me, it would be a big dose of confidence. I wonder about the people that appear confident. Are they truly confident or are they putting up a front? Maybe a little bit of both. Where does the belief that “I am enough” come from? From your parents/family? Does it depend on who you surround yourself with? Or is it cultivated from wisdom that can only come with age and experience?

I love the idea of waking up each day and saying to myself “I am enough”. Not thin enough, pretty enough, educated enough or whatever enough---simply enough.

“What the caterpillar thinks is the end of the world, the butterfly knows is only the beginning. ~ Anonymous

I am so appreciative of the perspective that I have this time around on my weight loss journey. I am not in a hurry and I am not using words to limit my progress. I’m doing my best to enjoy this journey because I know that whether I’m a caterpillar or a butterfly, I AM ENOUGH. And with every new thing I try or risk I take, I know that it's just the beginning of something really, really good.

Ask for help, make a choice, commit to the choice and continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

Pity Party- Table for One Please

This week’s post was supposed to be called “New Year, New Me” and be a reflection of the past year and to talk about where I’m headed. But in the spirit of always keeping it real, I did a 180.

Last night I had a very bad bout of neuralgia. It was triggered by the extreme cold and wind, one of my biggest pain triggers. You see, our dog was sick and I was the only one home with her so I had to make numerous potty trips outside with her. Add on to that a pressure-filled work day and the topper, my acupuncture appointment, which has been a God-send, actually made things worse.

Driving home from my acupuncture appointment, I was feeling pretty low. I had pain in the top of my head that felt like someone was tapping a nail into it. I had pain near my right cheekbone that felt like someone was pressing as hard as they could on my cheek and I had shooting pains up the back of my neck. These pains are nothing new to me, but I haven’t had them in a while and truthfully, I forgot how bad it hurt and how it made me feel.

As I drove through Valley Forge park, heat blaring in my car, scarf still wrapped around my head, I began to feel sad and angry. That’s just about the time I started to host a pity party, table for one, in my mind. I started to think, I am so tired of having to live my life like this. Will I really have to live the rest of my life like this? If so, it’s going to be a long long life.

When I got home, I grabbed a quick bit to eat and went up to bed. I turned out the lights, turned the TV on low, got my head to place where it was most comfortable and then I waited for the acupuncture to start doing its job and the pain to start going away. Sometimes it works, and sometimes I have to take my prescription medication. Acupuncture is not a cure, it’s meant to help reduce my pain frequency and duration.

And this is when the mental shift took place. We all deserve to indulge in a pity party every once in a while. A good cleansing cry. An angry fit. Whatever it takes to keep on keepin’ on. But what we cannot do is become a victim of our circumstances. If I choose to feel sorry for myself every time I don’t feel good, it is going to be a long long life, but if I choose instead to be grateful for every moment, the good and the bad, it’s going to be a long wonderful life, because that is what I choose to make it.

A few years ago, my cubicle buddy Debbie turned me on to this quote by Martha Washington- “I am determined to be cheerful and happy in whatever situation I may find myself. For I have learned that the greater part of our misery or unhappiness is determined not by our circumstance but by our disposition”.

I have always admired Deb’s sunshiny optimism, in spite of the circumstances she faced. It’s something I’ve tried to put this into practice whenever I can. Whatever you are facing this week, do not be a victim of your circumstance, be a champion of your destiny. The power is yours. The choice is yours. The chance is yours. The opportunity is yours. Every day is a fresh start- take it for all it’s worth and make it into something good.

Ask for help, make a choice, commit to the choice and continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

The Breakthrough

On occasion, when a topic pops into my mind to blog about, I write the subject line down and eventually come back to it. Two weeks ago, I wrote two words, “The Breakthrough”. I was tired of the plateau I was on and decided to kick things up a notch. I made the decision to really crack down on what I was eating and drinking and to increase the intensity of my exercise. And voila- results!

Something my Weight Watcher’s leader said in our meeting that morning made perfect sense. Sometimes people say “this program is not working for me” but in reality, they are not working the program. If you follow the Weight Watcher’s program, even tweaking it to meet your needs and lifestyle, it works!

Over the past two weeks, I dropped 4.1 pounds. I am officially down 24 pounds and am at a weight I haven’t seen since 2004. Yah-freakin-hoo-doo-dle-dee-doo! So how did I jumpstart my weight loss again?

I was extremely mindful about the quality of foods I put in my body, going for whole unprocessed foods (when possible).  I switched out my beloved white bread to white whole grain bread (baby steps, couldn’t jump right to wheat). ;) I made sure I had more dairy and was hitting my water quota. I only ate out twice, one time I made wise choices and the other time I had pizza and fries (hey, you have to live a little). I made sure we had ample healthy groceries in the house. I only had 1-2 point or 0 point snacks after dinner.  I paid close attention to the extra calories I was drinking, and I dusted off my favorite Weight Watcher’s cookbook and went back to some stand-by recipes. Folks, this is nothing earth shattering, but small changes lead to big results (long term).

I also cranked up my fitness. When I walk on the treadmill, I usually walk 3.0 to 3.2 MPH. Over the past two weeks, I’ve done small cardio bursts on the treadmill, walking 3.0 then fast walking 3.7. I also started wogging at the Y with my hubby Nate. Wogging? Walking and jogging of course.  I have been afraid to try jogging because I have two bad knees. I had tendonitis in both knees in high school and wasn’t sure I could ever jog again. So for most of my life, to save my knees, I’ve been doing low impact cardio. But I thought, let me test the waters a bit. I started out walking the Y track and jogging 1 lap and I’ve slowly increased my laps to jogging 8 which equals a half a mile. Jogging a half a mile and my knees still feel great, I’ll take it. I’m hoping that I can continue to increase my jogging because Nate used to run 5K’s and I’d love to be able to run with him someday- we’ll see.

All in all, it’s been a fantastic two weeks. Being able to up my weight loss while trying to manage the pre-Christmas chaos, multiple kids’ sports activities and working a lot of hours hasn’t been easy, but it’s been worth it!

Ask for help, make a choice, commit to the choice and continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

Limitless Part II

Last Saturday, I rolled out of bed. I wanted to go to Weight Watcher’s, but I was cold and my bed was toasty and it was early (well early for me).  My bed was so warm and toasty that I got up late, forced myself out of bed and went to the meeting, as is.

I was already reluctant to weigh in, not only was it the week after my Thanksgiving indulgences, but I hadn’t been on the scale for four weeks. What can I say? Sometimes life gets in the way and boy do those weeks fly by. So I grudgingly faced the scale and I gained .8 pounds. Considering the circumstances, coming off a week filled with so many pieces of chocolate cake that I had to throw it away and not putting my best foot forward for four weeks, I wasn’t surprised.

As I sat in the chair, waiting for the meeting to start, I fought off the negative voices and replaced them with thoughts like “Hey, at least you came back and you didn’t give up. And usually after a holiday binge, it’s easier to just stop and say ‘I’ll try another time’”.  While I was sitting in my chair, giving myself a pep talk, a familiar face walked in the door.

Many months ago, there was a woman named R (keeping her privacy) that walked in and sat next to me. It was her first Weight Watcher’s meeting. She walked in using a walker, harrumphing as she sat down. R confided that she was really nervous that she wouldn’t be able to lose weight. She was limited to her walker and couldn’t exercise. She lived alone and didn’t have anyone to help her out and hold her accountable. After exchanging a few encouraging words at the end of the meeting, R and I went our separate ways.

Fast forward to last Saturday. I hadn’t seen R in a while because I switched meeting days and I could not believe my eyes when she walked in the door. She looked fantastic!! I was so overjoyed to see her success, R had lost 50 pounds. She moved from a walker to a cane when her doctor told her she would always need her walker. In addition she had reduced several of her medications.

I was SO happy for this woman named R, a woman I barely knew; she really inspired me.  It made me think about my Limitless post from a few months ago. R faced so many obstacles, yet she didn’t let them get in the way of her success. R persevered and her persistence paid off. Instead of putting up excuses, she put up results and week by week she has changed how she lives her life.

I love seeing these success stories happen right before my eyes at my weekly Weight Watcher’s meetings. Besides working toward my own goals, these real life stories really keep me going.

This week, I encourage you to break free from the limits you place on yourself and that others place on you. You will be amazed at the great things you can do!

Ask for help, make a choice, commit to the choice and continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

The Panis

This Thanksgiving, my sister-in-law Lydia enlightened me to a new term- panis. Lydia is a nurse and somehow we got on the topic of her overweight patients and their panis’s. According to the Urban Dictionary- a panis is an unsightly bulge that hangs over ones belt. There are more graphic definitions, but let’s just leave those to your imagination.

As we sat around gorging ourselves with Thanksgiving deliciousness, we heard tales of the items that Lydia has found stuck in her patient’s panis’s- a TV remote control, a half of sandwich. And while of course we were chuckling about it, obesity is no laughing matter.

The word panis has now become a visual weight loss cue in my vocabulary- why? Because I don’t want to have one. In my heavier days, I had one. You know, that lovely roll of lower belly fat that kind of spreads out and touches everything when you bend down to pick something up. Need I say more?

And while I did over-indulge this Thanksgiving, I’m still feeling pretty great. For the first time in a long time, I can say that I am content with how I look, but more importantly with how I feel. I’m still not at my goal weight, but hey, I’m just feeling SO much better. The weight is coming off super slow, but I am focusing on how I feel- mentally, physically, spiritually- and (most days) I feel fantastic.

Maybe this feeling and appreciation comes with getting older? The first time around on Weight Watcher’s, I was so goal driven that I forgot to cherish the process and my progress. You know, the whole “it’s the journey not the destination thing”.  And this time, I am just so appreciative that I even get to be on this journey. I am thankful that I have made the choice to take care of me, because, in turn, this helps me to take care of others. I am thankful that I can afford the Weight Watcher’s meetings. I am thankful that I have friends and family that support my efforts. I am thankful that I have work-life balance and a schedule that helps me do what I need to do. I am thankful that each day I have more energy to exercise and even more so that I enjoy it. I am thankful that God has given me a body that works and the wisdom to know I need to take care of it, because it’s the only one I’ll get.

And lastly, I’m thankful that I don’t have a panis (anymore). ;) Ha, ha!

Hoping that your Thanksgiving gratitude carries over into the Christmas season, I am thankful for you!

Ask for help, make a choice, commit to the choice and continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

Winning the Race

Last week, during our company meeting, one topic that came up was how Team New Zealand finally came to win the America’s Cup.  The focus of our meeting was about “getting better” by setting small goals that result in big change over time. It was said that Team New Zealand was able to win the America’s Cup by making small focused changes in their performance, and these changes helped them to win the race.

This image really stuck in my mind, picturing the crew working together as a team to tweak their performance really got me thinking about my work and personal performance and how I could kick things up a notch. It also got me thinking about my weight loss efforts.  I love Weight Watcher’s because they embrace this notion of small goals leading to big change.  When you join, you work toward reaching 5% of your weight loss, then 10% of your weight loss, then finally your goal weight.  This makes that daunting weight loss (that seems to take forever) more achievable.

This time around for me on Weight Watcher’s, just like Team New Zealand, I decided to make small manageable changes. I decided that making drastic changes just weren’t sustainable in the long term for me. And as hard as it was to accept, I had to embrace the fact that small changes do not lead to instant results. There are so many diet programs out there that promise a quick fix- lose 20 inches in 20 days or lose 30 pounds in 30 days- and these may work short term, but as soon as you go off the plan, or stop taking the magic pills, the weight loss comes back on.

Those of you who know me well know I am an extremely picky eater. My repertoire of vegetables consists of green beans. I throw caution to the wind by trying wheat bread. And that’s OK. I might not be eating perfect, but I’m eating better. Back in the day, my typical lunch from Burger King was a Whopper, large fries, large coke and an apple pie. Now, I really don’t choose to go to Burger King, but if I do with my kids, I make different choices. I now have a kid’s cheeseburger, apple fries and a small coke. Yes, I still have my coke; I love me an iced cold Coca-Cola! I’d rather have a coke once a week and savor it and have water the rest of the week. It may not seem like a lot, but that’s a difference of 990 calories for one meal. Imagine the impact this small change can make over several meals per week, per year and MAN, you will start to win that race.

Weight loss, is a life change, tweaking small habits over time until you reach and then stay at your goal. For me, weight loss is about making those changes but still living and enjoying my life.

What’s one small change you can make this week that could lead to big results?

Ask for help, make a choice, commit to the choice and continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara

Baggage Check

A few weeks ago during our Weight Watcher’s meeting, our leader asked the question “besides the scale, how do you measure your success?” There were a variety of great responses- more energy, taking less medication, able to exercise longer, able to play with my kids more, clothing is loose and just overall feeling better. Our leader talked about visual reminders of success. It’s a great way to notice your weekly weight loss successes, big and small; from a five pound bag of sugar to a ten pound bag of potatoes. The first time around on Weight Watcher’s, I lost 40 pounds. I was carrying around four large bags of potatoes, no wonder I was so tired all the time. This time around on Weight Watcher’s, the weight is coming off a lot slower. I’m fourteen years older and my priorities have shifted. Most weeks, after working very hard, my weight loss is .5 pounds. And that’s OK, as long as the scale is moving in the right direction.  

Think about the size of a one pound dumbbell, or a can of vegetables; although they may be small, they still take up some real estate and it’s a great way to visualize the smaller weight losses coming off your body. Last year, when I worked in an office, I used to carry a fabulous purple leather laptop bag. Because I had to walk from the car into the office and up two flights of stairs, I loaded that bag up. It held my laptop, work files, lunch bag, water bottle and so forth.  And let me tell you, that bag was hea-vy! Every day when I entered into the lobby, I was faced with a choice- walk the two flights of stairs, or take the elevator and every day (unless I was feeling seriously spunky); I took the elevator because the bag was so darned heavy. One night after work, I decided to weigh my laptop bag and it weighed eleven pounds!

Fast forward to today.  I have lost 22 pounds- two laptop bags! My visual reminder is my purple laptop bag. I was so tired carrying that extra weight each day that I took the elevator, it was really bogging me down. I wonder, what extra weight are you carrying on your shoulders each day? Is someone or something weighing you down? What can you do to lighten your load? And how can others around you help?

Ask for help, make a choice, commit to the choice and continue with courage.

Hugs and friendship,

Tara